How to marry a man who does not want to marry
Thus you deprive him of thrill, excitement and pleasure.
When it comes to maintaining the interest of men in the right tone, your strategy should be reduced to two rules:
- you can and should show him your interest in him;
- you can NOT and should not show him your interest in “twirling” and “choking” him.
Men are programmed by nature to protect their freedom. As soon as you start hinting at a more serious relationship or pedaling the topic of marriage, he will turn on the mental defense mode or simply run away. And he is not guilty. Just at that moment, when you start talking about your matrimonial plans, an alarm goes off in it, and the defense mechanism turns on the autopilot of releasing the lasso you are trying to throw at it.
And if it does not, then it's all the same: after hearing the words "monogamy," "children," "mortgage," or even an entirely innocent "minivan," he will erect a wall between you so that you can break through it You can not for the year.
And then I strongly recommend that you destroy the following topics in your head and erase the following topics from your vocabulary:
"Have you ever wanted to find your soul mate?"
"How do you feel about marriage?"
“How do you see our future?”
"I'm so lonely, so there is not enough of a man's shoulder. And what would you like to see your wife? "
Have you read in glossy magazines that “you need to talk openly about issues of interest to you”? Forget it. All the peasants know perfectly well that they want to be disgraced. And to talk on this topic with a specific individual is only time to waste. The effect will be strictly reverse.
Rule number 1.Whether it is the topic of "exclusivity" at the beginning of a relationship, or the proposal to "manage a joint farm" in a few months, or the engagement issue in six months is all not your moves. You are forbidden to raise these topics in general and even more so to throw cards on the table and speak in the open.
Rule number 2.The man in your relationship is him. He should raise these topics, invite him to meet you exclusively and live together, give him a ring, give him a marriage proposal. If this has not happened yet, it means that you are doing something wrong.This is a reason to make a relationship audit, but there is no reason to raise and pedal these topics.
Rule number 3.You lose your power when you ask him the question: “Where are our relations going?” Because you just told him that the tempo, rhythm and conditions of your union will be dictated to you.
If this happens at the moment when he is not ready to make his move, he will hear in his brain “At-him, marry!”, Feel pressure and coercion, - the gateways and sidings will open. Ways of retreat. And the more you sharpen these topics, the more often you bring it to the subject of interest, the stronger your interest in taking the relationship to a new level, the faster it will retreat and more actively plan its escape.
And if, God forbid (again, following the advice of glossy magazines and all sorts of different LJ theorists, “gore” -guru, giving “psychological” instructions from the field of “ecological feelings”), you will issue an ultimatum that “in six months on this finger there should be a ring ", you will designate a clear and definite time when a holy place next to you ... will become empty
I summarize the foregoing: do not pedal matrimonial themes.
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